Dear Souls in Earthsuits,
How painful it can be to find one’s true voice. I remember my own voyage well, and it is probably one of the hardest feats to accomplish:
To find your identifiable voice…
The voice that has not been tarnished by others influence, but born of accepted experience; your own thoughts, your own opinions, and your own fire. I will say, though, that it is the most invigorating, most accomplished, most liberating discovery known to me at this time. And I’m still peripatetic and searching.
The simple fact that you said, “I don’t want to follow a call, I want to make the call,” demonstrates the difference in you. And I am so glad you did, because I knew it was there. The desire to find your voice is the stamp of a leader and I see it in you. How often have you sat by yourself agonizing? How many nights have you feared insomnia? How often have you worried that it’s simply your thought that disquiets you? You’re on your way, then.
Thought: devoid of space and time.
We can say that we’re tagging a time line to it, but thought can’t be pinned down with periods and phases, and thought is not confined by areas and plots. Therefore, your thought is boundless; it is inexhaustible; it is vast, and it is the precise strategy needed for designing your voice.
I can’t say that it’s not painful, and I can’t say I was never downright livid at times. I remember crying, I remember shouting. I remember confusion and second guessing. I remember agony and nuisance. And I will never forget it either, because they were the very seeds that grew … me. But once you break through, it’s like discovering you have this awesome secret super power that no one else has. It’s an explosion of enlightenment… even if others don’t agree; even if the masses don’t identify — you do. And that’s all that matters. It is validation in you. It is the authorization to believe. It’s less second-guessing and more advising. Things like that foster your conviction that what you feel is worth sharing.
You transform from a member of the infantry into a ranger. Your self-proclaimed revolution releases you from the reigns of society and you empower yourself to lead the pack. So… it really is worth the fight.
Please, please, please keep searching for your voice, because I know you have something to say and I know it needs to be shared – no matter how afraid you are of whatever comes out… someone needs it. And keep in touch, let me know your frustrations and joys and confusion. An artist’s soul bores the mastery of abstraction.